A List

Things That I Didn’t Fully Consider Before Moving to Los Angeles

1) Income/Job. I really whole-heartedly believed that I would be making money as an actor by now. (maybe not in the millions quite yet, but something). I certainly did not consider the idea that I would be still working at Barnes and Noble for $8.50 an hour. And I certainly certainly did not consider how not having a jump start on any career at my age would look on a resume. I haven’t traveled or done anything. It’s going to look stupid.

2) Community That Fits My Needs. I think that this is something that I just recently discovered. I need a community. I can’t just live in a place where no one relates to each other. I like to look someone in the eye and understand where they’re coming from and know that they’re doing the same to me (a very New York thing, so I’m told). I want a community where I can easily find a place within it, as an artist, musician, whatever. I want there to be places to meet people that don’t involve being on a list. I want to be around people of the same level of culture, not so uneducated that I can’t relate to their background, but also not so snooty that I’m left out. Note: This is not to say that I don’t want to learn from different people. I don’t know how to explain this. An example would be when I worked at Universal, none of my co-workers had been to college. Four years of my recent history were completely unmentionable. I couldn’t really talk about my experiences with them and nor did I want to tout my degree around. So I didn’t make friends. They thought I was “too smart” and were threatened and I responded by labeling them uneducated street thugs. I dunno, maybe that didn’t make my case, just makes me sound like a preppy asshole. Whatever. I know what I mean.

3) Other People. This sounds stupid and broad, but I didn’t consider the idea that other people in my life (mostly friends and coworkers) really truly don’t give a shit about my life. Nor should they (this is the key part). No one should care as much about me as ME. No one. More importantly, I overestimated my ability to be accepting and patient with their life choices.

5)Plan B. As in, I had none. I should have thought about what I would have done if this didn’t work beyond just a theoretical plan. “I’ll just be a teacher.” “I’ll just go to law school.” “I’ll just be the president.” Yeah. Whatever.

I’ve written these down so that I can refer to them and consider them more carefully before I move to where ever I move next.


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